Friday, December 26, 2014

Day 361

I got new boobies today. 

I have been in Texas now for five days. My luggage has never made it to Texas to join me. I broke down and bought another pair of underwear the other day, but opted not to buy another bra. For one, they are crazy expensive. Secondly, I can never find one that fits me right. That's probably because I buy cheap bras though- paying $30 for something no one but me sees just seems silly. I seriously haven't bought a bra other than a sports bra for two years.

But after several days in the same breast holder, ibroke down today and asked my step-daughter in law if I could borrow a sports bra. She came back with 5 different types for me to try on...

You see, she is a Victoria's Secret bra specialist. Like literally. She has a tape measure and everything. So asking her for a  sports bra is no simple endeavor. She quickly sized me up and held out one for me to try on, but it was fancier than anything I currently have in my drawer at home, let alone my suitcase.I closed the bathroom door, placed the piece of satin around my chest, then looked in the mirror. 

Huh. Look at that.

I opened the door and looked at her- "oh yeah" she said with a smile.

"Look! I have boobs!" I exclaimed. 

"Wait until you see how that vneck shirt looks like with that on".

Huh. Look at those...

We went to dinner tonight and I went to the bathroom. Washing my hands, I glanced up in the mirrowo and actually gave a little start. Wow. I guess I need to start buying real bras.

When we returned to the house, she gifted me with about five new bras, assuring me she had drawers and bins full of boobie-lifting miracles and wouldn't miss them.   

So tonight's picture represents the magic of the push-up bra. Because I always say I can deal with Mother Nature- but Grandma Gravity is a relentless bitch. 



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